We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
