so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
