she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize