Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
