Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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