did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
