are you still at the devil's house?
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
