Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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