OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
