everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
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