My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Randomize
