I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
