I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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