before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Randomize
