margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
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