I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
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