For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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