sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
