Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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