I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
