Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
