nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Randomize
