Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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