Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
