Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Randomize
