dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Randomize
