all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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