Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
