I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
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