it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
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