Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
