On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
