life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
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I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
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I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
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