His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Holy sore nipples Batman
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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