Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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