return my video game
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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