drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Screwed.edu
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
