i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
