mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
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