whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Randomize
