wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
operation harelip BJ is a go
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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