I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.