Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
it's like heaven, but drunker
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Randomize
