Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize