What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
fuck your aforementioned shoe
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
