if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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