im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
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