Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
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