i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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