haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Randomize
